Feelin' good.

oh man.
today i felt a renewed sensitivity towards God. After being so caught up with school work and time-wasting, i prayed hard that if this was the only place i met God during the week, then at least i could meet him here today. He was definitely there today.
During the worship, just the first song...i couldn't help but feel a strong tugging at my heart and a lump in my throat. The sermon really hit home. I felt affirmed that my struggle with God was OK, that it was a beautiful thing to be able to show our imperfections too....
I wanted to escape to the back door to cry it out but was trapped by greetings and superficial convos (that i normally enjoy enormously).

I have a renewed sense of prayer too. In the past week or so i've been trying to pray more; today, it felt so peaceful. it flowed out like conversation....THAT is such a good feeling of closeness to God's heart.

Ah, one more story.
On the bus today, a man brought in a 6 ft long flourescent tube on the bus. The bus driver didn't let him on because it might be a danger if it broke, etc...and this went on for a little while, with the man saying, "well, what am i supposed to do?"
So I prayed...for the bus driver's heart to be softened, that the man would be let on the bus...and Ta DAaaa! The BD called in to a superior, and i guess the superior agreed to it, so BD was all "ok! it's fine."

*secret smile*
*he doesn't know he was up against God*

10 lbs slower

I`ve gained 10 lbs. this past school year.
So much for 2 gym memberships, soccer, parkour...

I wanna RUN like the air!!
I wanna LAND like a cat!!!
I wanna ZIP back and forth like lasers!!!
I wanna FIT into my pants!! bahahahaa

RULES for the rest of March:
1. Drink 1 litre of H2O per day
2. Go to 2hrs of gym classes per week(Th/Fr)
3. 3 hr. break in between snacks/meals

Bloody awesome

I donated blood today for the 2nd time! You should too!

Only about 1 in 60 donated blood last year (wait, is that.....1.7%!!?!? lower than the US's 5%?!). This all goes to the 4-6 days' supply of blood that is used to meet the bloody needs of the entire country. Yes, more is needed. Yes, it's in you to give!

It's part of your biological potential to help others....put those body fluids to better use - saving lives (up to 3 for every donation, they say!). Their privacy policy is relatively OK, so even if you feel that your blood might not be acceptable, they repeatedly give you the choice to say "no, don't use my blood".

Now, for you Jesus freaks, our role model donated his blood to save our souls, we should donate our blood to save others' bodies. After that, maybe they'll get chances to be soul-saved too. Everyone wins! Start counting those heavenly crowns! I have 2 more than you do, virgin donors.

My resolution after going the first time was to bring someone to donate with me every time I went....darn, I broke it already. Anyone want to come with me next?

Udpate!

I have been feeling very distant from the world lately. Lately as in...the past year, possibly.
I've often experienced things that I just wanted to explode into words in someone's face, but I didn't know who I could go to. It's been very lonely. I miss my friends.

It's scary to approach my friends now, because I've lost touch with many of them.
As if I don't deserve to be supported by them....as well, having distanced myself from one friend in particular felt like building a wall between me and his buddies who were also my friends.
I skipped church, small group, and gtalk a LOT this past year!! and blamed school! I MISS THE OLD DAYS SO MUCH.

I can't hang on!! gaaaaaaahh......[echo echooo echooooooo]

This past year, dani has reverted back to shyness and lack of confidence. Without my community, I lose my strength...

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***onto the better stuff....the stuff i meant to talk about at first***

There's two good things about school right now....tomboys and sports!!! Yea, I have two 10-pg papers this year (last year my longest one was 4 pages....i'm doooomed)!

SOC633: Sexualities, Identities, and Society - the TOMBOY paper!!
I'm pretty excited about this one, looking forward to researching it but not writing it.
It was only in first year of uni that I had this amazing revelation that I am/had been a "tomboy". Not so much anymore...I'm trying to be more hegemonically "girly". *sigh*

What makes tomboyism permissible in childhood and adolescence but not in adulthood?
What discourses repress or promote masculinity in women?
What's with the stereotype that tomboys will grow up to be lesbian?
What makes "tomboys" so non-threatening compared to "butch lesbian"?


#2. INT902: Disability Issues---Sports and Disability paper!
This is quite interesting...I'll be exploring how social and structural conditions surrounding disabled sports have oppressed the athletes within them.

I see now that I've been turning a blind eye to this particular marginalized population.....what do you see when I say "sports"? wheelchair basketball/rugby/tennis? sitting volleyball? People swimming without arms? A blind man running the 400m?

yeaa, didn't think so. Also interesting is the idea of reconceptualizing the BODY, example here:


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mmmm....that's it for now, folks!

Bumbling fool.

Tonight, I walked loudly into a classroom 30 minutes late;
in winter gear;heaving, sweaty, with heeled boots;
had the prof interrupt the lesson to hand me a syllabus...
....plomped down to take a look, realized it was the wrong class (business statistics!?),
and tripped on my way out.
while accidently slamming the door on the trashcan.

It was hilarious!

not to mention allowing the all-too-common Windows Vista startup sound to be maxed on the laptop. (but that was in my actual class).

I feel like a first year!

Written August 28.08

Once again, my whole list of summer goals was not completed. not a single one of them.
This summer, i've found myself an energetic, joyful person.....but so apathetic about faith, about living it, studying it, understanding it.

i've been questioning where my passion and gifts lie. On the last T-wide, Julie said something extremely encouraging to me...."Dani, you're like the most wanted person at ET. on any sports team, any ministry team, everyone wants you..."
whoa, no way. that was a really amazing feeling, a dash of pride in there....but to know that also made me feel a little ashamed of where i was at the moment.
so where do i go? where will i find my joy and my fuel?
where will i find that thing, that i think about all the time and want to recreate and better and immerse myself in??

I talked to a friend at banquet, who had come back from a missions trip at jane and finch. He said the thing he learned was that there are so many Christians who are sitting on their butt doing nothing about everything that's going on around them.

It's like sitting on your hands while you pray.

like jono said, it makes me feel so ashamed, looking at my own life.
how stale.
and selfish.
ther'es so much more i can do.
i'm not passive, i'm just inactive.

wes found a mouse.

it was cute, so i picked it up.


and ate it.